高考英語閱讀理解（簡體書）

Passage 33
If you want to teach your children how to say sorry, you must be good at saying it yourself,especially to your own children. But how you say it can be quitetricky.
If you say to your children "I am sorry I got angry with you, but... " what follows that"but" can make the apology ineffective: "I had a bad day" or "your noise was giving me aheadache" leaves the person who has been injured feeling that he should be apologizing for hisbad behavior in expecting an apology.
Another method by which people appear to apologize without actually doing so is to say"Im sorry youre upset" ; this suggests that you are somehow at fault for allowing yourself to getupset by what the other person has done.
Then there is the general, all-covering apology, which avoids the necessity of identifying aspecific act that was particularly hurtful or insulting, and which the person who is apologizingshould promise never to doit again. Saying "Im useless as a parent" does not commit a personto any specific improvement.
These pseudo-apologies (虛假的道歉) are used by people who believe saying sorry showsweakness. Parents who wish to teach their children to apologize should see it as a sign ofstrength, and therefore not depend on these pseudo-apologies.
But even when presented with examples of realregret, children still need help to becomeaware of the complexities (復雜性) of saying sorry. A three-year-old might need help inunderstanding that other children feel pain just as he does, and that hitting a playmate over thehead with a heavy toy requires an apology. A six-year-old might need reminding that spoilingother childrens expectations can require an apology. A 12-year-old might need to be shown thateating the biscuit without asking permission is acceptable, but that borrowing a parents clotheswithout permission is not.